#BeingCatholic Update is out! http://t.co/V5yYbiZ4hL ? Top stories today via @CatholicsHome @EndPoverty @1missionfamily
Posted on May 24th 2013, 19:09
@MagnificatMag it was a pleasure meeting you as we'll!
Posted on May 23rd 2013, 19:01
RT @asmcentee: "if we reduce the New Evangelization to a program, it's not going to work" AMEN. #disciplescalledtowitness #NCCL2013
Posted on May 23rd 2013, 15:19
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@Eillax Amen.
Posted on May 23rd 2013, 14:05
The #HolySpirit must be central to our Catechesis - Dr. Ospino #NCCL2013
Posted on May 23rd 2013, 13:12
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  The Family That Prays Together…April 9th, 2012I am from India. I can trace my ancestry back to 1823 and if I want, beyond that too. People find it difficult to connect my being Indian and Catholicism. Most people presume that I am a recent convert to Catholicism. In fact, as far back into 1823 my family was Catholic (Eastern Catholic). For generations, then, faith has been passed along with untiring zeal and passion. When I was a child, my father often repeated the well-known adage: “The family that prays together stays together.” And I believed it. That is, until now. About my childhood family – it was mom, dad, my brother and I. Mom and dad both worked for the government. That meant financial security even though the income was meager. But what set us apart was that we were a praying family. Ours was the model family in the parish. Priest and nuns often came and dined at our home and our family was often quoted as the Christian family par excellence. We prayed each morning and night – together. Before my brother and I left to the Catholic school my parents could barely afford, we would gather together and pray. After dinner each night, we prayed again, sometimes for a good half hour. There was not a Sunday we missed mass whether it was the Cricket World Cup or plain tiredness. For most part we prayed together and stayed together. That was thirty years back when we were my brother and I were kids. I went on to the Seminary, was ordained in 1994 and today I am a priest of 18 years. Here is my greatest question though. Why did the family that prayed together not stay together? It happens that today my only brother is something between an agnostic and an atheist. He could care less for the Catholic Church that the stray dogs that roam the streets of India. He loves and respects me not because I am a priest but because I am his brother. My brother is not a bad guy. There was a time when he baptized his only daughter, participated in her First Holy Communion event and even today, will drive my parents and me to church when we visit him. But at the heart of his passion are the people of Bhopal, who were affected by the Bhopal gas tragedy of 1984. The Union Carbide factory (now Dow Chemicals) spewed poisonous gas and thousands of people died while others remain affected for decades or even generations to come. This population was neither compensated justly nor their needs met adequately. My brother works for the government during the week and in the weekends, he’d rather be with the people in their struggle to cope with daily life than be at Church. You may ask why he could not do both? “Because,” he says, “the church is only interested in getting people to church! The question is why does the church not go the people?” He was referring to the local church’s lack of involvement in the struggles of the people of Bhopal. At other times he has said to me, “There is a reason why Mother Teresa is already a saint and Archbishop Oscar Romero will never be. I think it is because one took care of the poor whereas the others questioned the system that creates the poor. Where is the church and on whose side is the church today?” I know numerous once-upon-a-time-church-going-people who think similarly. They are young and adults alike whose alienation from the church is a moral stance. The abuse crisis and the immunity of top leadership, the concentration of decision making in the hands of a male dominated hierarchy, the unwillingness to even dialogue about women priesthood, and even the recent liturgical changes are among the reasons why some have alienated themselves from the church. Our archdiocese is embarking on a major initiative called “Christ at the Center.” The goal is to “explore the challenges that families face today and discover with one another viable tools and methods for evangelizing and ministering to the church of the home.” Perhaps, one of the assumptions of this initiative is that if we can educate the parents about faith, then children will keep the faith. My experience tells me that educating families in faith and providing them the resources for evangelizing and ministering to the church of the home, while beneficial, is not a panacea for a vibrant church community. Because, if I consider my family, the family that prayed together did not necessarily stay together. For that, THE CHURCH TOO MUST CHANGE. For example, the church must ask itself if it’s paternalistic organizational structure is healthy for its own good? Is the silencing and excommunication of reasonable theological voices the best way to deal with dissent? We made organizational changes as a result of the abuse crisis – but have we been church to the victims and their families the way Christ would? In the recent liturgical changes did we settle for uniformity rather than unity? Why do people who migrate to evangelical churches talk about their faith journey in the Catholic Church as devoid of the experience of God? Why do scores of people find themselves spiritually starved after their weekly celebration of the Eucharist? These are the kinds of questions that people who grew up Catholic and have since conscientiously alienated themselves from the church are asking. Meanwhile, my parents and numerous elderly parents who hurt because their children have left the church have their question, “What did we do wrong?” I often say to them, “It is not your fault.” My family prayed together too but did not stay together in faith. That makes is sad for my family and for my church. My next installments of Being Catholic blog will continue from where I left off. They will center on the church, culture and change. 
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Fr. Satish,
Your blog offers many thought-provoking questions. One that has much been on my heart is the role of the nuclear family, or as John Paul II called it, the Domestic Church. As I consider my own extended family, who has stayed with the Church and who has left, there seems to be no clear line of distinction in relation to their formation.
I think we have to start by admitting that every adult individual is designed by God to be free and make the free choice whether or not they will practice the faith as adults. It is interesting that you note your brother even raised his daughter to the point of first communion. Clearly, this suggests that leaving the Church was very much your brother’s adult decision. He reached it well after he left your parents’ home.
It could be that some of us choose to embrace the Church, and some choose to reject it, regardless of our home experience. However, we families are not yet perfect. Therefore, we can always improve how we work to form ourselves. Do we build family faith rituals? Do we understand what is really going on in the Mass, and do we explain it to our children? Do we make time for retreats? Do we inform our children about the many challenges of faith in the world, before we expose our children to them?
You mention that many Catholics who leave the Church note a lack of experience of God. On the flipside, many who enter the Church through RCIA mention the experience of God. In my personal recollection, they almost all mention a conviction towards the truthfulness of the Church’s teaching. Many also mention the impressive rituals and traditions of the Church that date back through history.
This great Church of ours is always growing as it seeks more effective ways to communicate the message of Christ. Some things change BECAUSE THEY SHOULD. Many things do not change BECAUSE THEY CANNOT. That is the burden of Truth. Many people do not understand the distinctions between the things that can change and the things that cannot. I hope we can get better at clarifying the distinctions. I also hope we can evermore improve our effective outreach to families, in order that they might evermore become what they are, communions of persons.
Thanks for your comments, Josh. One of the sources we often refer to is the survey conducted by the PEW foundation. The data is clear – decline. I have been at the Rite of Election for the last ten years because it is held in my parish. There are more empty pews each year. The purpose of my blog is to get to the bottom of this along with a conversation with the Catholic community and those who have abandoned the church. There are many ways to do this. One thing to do is ask ourselves who we are as church. Are we a good reflection of the Kingdom of God?The second thing to do is to engage people who have abandoned the church. As I say in my blog, for many people this is an informed decision. The third thing to do is to see if there are things we must as church to be more authentically the church of Christ. The church is both divine and human. To the extent it is divine SHE CANNOT CHANGE. To the extent it is human, SHE STANDS IN NEED OF CONVERSION/CHANGE.
Fr. Satish
I think it really depends on what you mean by human and divine. For example, Christ divinely instituted seven human signs and made them into sacraments. The fact that they are human signs in no way means that they are open to change.
Likewise, Christ divinely instituted Peter and his successors as Leaders of the Church in order that she might be eternally protected from error on matters of faith an morals. This is another human element of the Church that cannot change.
.All of us human beings who make up the church are in need of change and conversion until we become living saints, but the Church, herself is HOLY, a title won for her by the eternal sacrifice of Jesus Christ.
I am all in favor of dialogue and efforts for mutual understanding. In fact, I am passionate about them. But I think we owe it to ourselves and to the world be clear on what is meant by dialogue, efforts through mutual sharing that the truth might be more clearly understood (not compromised).
I hear an awful lot about change lately, but I do not hear so much about faithfulness. Faith is not blind, mindless obedience. It is a commitment to trust in something even when I do not fully understand all of it. Some people oppose the Church and leave it without ever really trying to understand WHY the Church might be teaching something that is difficult. Not that this should surprise us. Some people rejected Christ. Of course some people will reject His Church.
This is what is so wonderful about our Church. It does not concern itself with popularity contests or public opinion polls. It concerns itself with teaching timeless truths.
In my own little family, my domestic church, my children do not always understand bedtime or why they cannot have more dessert, but they know we love them. Therefore they trust us and strive to understand our wisdom on such things.
Do we perhaps sometimes fail to trust the Church’s wisdom on things that cannot change? I pray we may all better come to understand what the Church teaches, what can change, and what cannot.
Hi Josh,
How about engaging the people who wrote the last three comments? Reply to them. I would be interested in seeing how it works out and what the result of the conversation might.
Sure, Father. I understand that you are busy. Thank you for taking the time to respond to my comments.
Fr. Satish,
We cannot and should not blame the Church for every stray sheep. Sometimes the wood next to the fire never burns. The Church does not need change so much as to be heard in this noisy world. After stopping off at the “evangelical” communities, many still go on to a self-styled or faithless life. Your brother left the faith for bitterness. Judas left Christ for the poor, at least that was his excuse. We see everywhere not indifference but animosity toward the Church. Praying is not enough for the many because they demand worldly works to their own liking or to a quasi-scientific proof of faith or they have some petty hurt to assuage. In the end, most seem to just seek themselves, which is why they want to impose their own ways into liturgy and disciplines. Most leave the faith without knowing what they abandoned. This has been the story from Genesis to today. Why do we need to change the Church for those who raise bile for that which they never knew? The one, true church has hundreds, thousands of different modes of faithful expression. The unhappy need to seek them, not change the Church. Let’s first try to teach what the Church is, build our domestic churches, require more–not less–of our people, stop trying to be of this world, and then see the fruits of our labors in the Lord. Rejoice in the fact that your brother’s faith background urges him to serve the poor in his own way.
Wendell Hull
Thanks for your comment Wendell. The church is both human and divine. To the extent it is divine, it cannot change; to o the extent it is human it constantly stands in need of conversion. In fact, we are constantly called to renewal both as individuals and as a community. Are you not glad the church’s policy on child protection has CHANGED? Remember what John Paul the II did? He apologized to world for the sins of the church. Sometimes, change means conversion.
The questions you have raised, Father, are indeed important ones. I think as human beings we often resist change in general because change, even for the better, ALWAYS challenges us. It is far too easy to remain in our comfort zone and reject out of hand any idea or attempt at dialogue that we perceive as threatening the present condition of our Church.
The Church is ever changing. For goodness sake…our daily prayers include petitions for the priesthood and consecrated religious. This is just one striking, undeniable how example of how change happens in the Church. I think we must ask ourselves if this situation may be a call to change on the part of the Church or do we just write it off as unfortunate and out of our control. And if in reading these last few lines you feel resistance already welling up in “defense” of the Church, I would suggest you have not truly understood what I have said.
When I read Matthew 6:33 “Seek first the Kingdom of God”, I hear Jesus speaking to me today…as an individual who is part of a family and is a member of the Church. I hear him asking me to keep seeking, keep growing, keep changing. This means I must accept the fact that I do not have all the answers nor does any individual or institution on this earth. We are called to participate in the change that will inevitably happen in our Church…not just let it happen.
Hi Gail, thanks for you very honest comment. Fr Satish asked me to reply to it. I mentioned above the importance of tempering change with our commitment of faithfulness to the timeless and unchangeable elements of the Church. I was wondering if you would share your opinion on how we balance the relationship between openness to CHANGE and humble commitment to FAITH.
If we are to remain a strong and relevant presence in today’s society, we must change with the times. If we are truly a people committed to social justice, we must respond to the needs of people, both spiritual and physical, as they are today. Though the central tenants and spiritual basis for our faith are eternal, the outward expression of such cannot fail to be responsive to the time in which we are living. Websites, apps, blogs and our embrace of technology to spread the Gospel are just a few of the ways Mother Church is doing just that. If we allow ourselves to utilize new devices and techniques to propogate our faith, there is no reason we cannot be as equally elastic in our response to the societal injustices we see everyday, at home and all over the world. The Church has a crucial role to play in lifting people up, and by having an open and honest dialogue with our Churhc family, both practicing and lapsed, we make ourselves a place of compassion and dignity for all.
Krista,
You are very eloquent in how you describe the Church’s improved techniques of outreach. Fr. Satish asked me to respond to your comment. I mentioned above the importance of tempering change with our commitment of faithfulness to the timeless and unchangeable elements of the Church. I was wondering if you would share your opinion on how we balance the relationship between openness to CHANGE and humble commitment to FAITH.
I thank you, Fr. Satish, for your very honest blog about the church and the questions that have been raised by many people. I was raised in a very active, faithful Catholic family with two siblings. I am the only remaining Catholic of my two sisters and I (my parents continue to be active Catholics as well). I don’t particularly blame the Church for this, but as my husband and I are raising our three children, many questions have come up for me about the Church as well. I worry that the Church’s patriarchy and unwillingness to even dialogue about allowing women’s ordination is delivering a message of injustice toward women that I am uncomfortable passing on to my children. I remain in the Church because my faith is rooted in it and there is so much that I love about it. I pray that the Church will be open to change guided by the Holy Spirit. As Gail pointed out, change is difficult and human beings tend to resist change. Tradition is a good thing and it is one of the things that I love about the Catholic church, but change is necessary too. Jesus, after all, challenged the religious leaders of his time and preached a message that involved change, which some accepted and others resisted. I continue to pray that the Church be open to change as guided by the Spirit.
Hi Eileen,
Thank you for your comments and for you continued passion for the Catholic Faith. Fr. Satish asked me to respond to your comment. I mentioned above the importance of tempering change with our commitment of faithfulness to the timeless and unchangeable elements of the Church. I was wondering if you would share your opinion on how we balance the relationship between openness to CHANGE and humble commitment to FAITH.
This is a little more simplistic that the other responses but here it goes:
I know what I want to change about our church. I want to change the confirmation mass, where teachers, parents and others lay hands on the confirmation candidates with zeal and faith so the candidates feel the presence of The Holy Spirit and even slain in the spirit; I want religious educators that are so filled with the Holy Spirit and His knowledge that they can teach (and really live like Christ) and make the faith come alive through all the fascinating teachings and traditions of our faith-where it is their job to make sure each of their students know God and His Church and have the answers to defend it if needed; I want my parish community to live like Christ, to try to see everyone as God’s son or daughter; I want holy priests to apologize for all the unholy priests to the people hurt by them, so they can come back fully to our faith; I want priests to tell us about our faith during the homily-so we can defend it if we need to; I want music at mass that is beautiful and brings me closer to heaven. I want each person to share their gifts from God so our church community is filled by The Spirit. I want to be around holy people that pray and go to daily mass and inspire me to be like them.
Dear Debbie,
Many Catholics leave the church and become Evangelical because of their lack of experience of God. You are saying, “Church of God, get me to God.” I hear you…
You got it! Thanks for hearing me.
Debbie – how eloquent and simplistic a want…and yes, I agree with you whole – heartedly. How can we make, and bring upon this change? Tell the world… albeit tell the teachers, the parents, lay people…etc. and the priests, one-at-a-time. YOU did just that here.
Bob
Thank you Fr. Satish,
Clearly the Church has changed in the past and will change in the future.
But, as I read the comments, I wonder if “change” in the abstract doesn’t distract us from the issue you are wrestling with. The question is the Church living up to the fullness of its own mission. Change here is perhaps equally well described as repentance. We fall short of what Christ calls us to do. We settle into ruts of liturgy, preaching, ministry, discipleship…comfortable routines that look Christian enough, but are asleep to the danger and freedom that Christ offers us.
If met so many passionate people like your brother who are scandalized by the torpor of Christ’s disciples in the Church. They haven’t alientated themselves, we all bear responsibility for their alienation.
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Dear Fr. Satish,
I am a non-Catholic Army officer that attended your service with my Catholic wife and daughter. I served in Iraq for nearly fifteen months. Of the sixteen Soldiers under my command, three were killed and three were injured to the point where they had to to be evacuated from theater. That being said, we helped numerous Iraqis in improving their daily lives, which I take personal pride in. At the same time and throughout it all, I have had a difficult time re-finding my faith in god. You inspired me. Thank you.
V/R,
Andrew